10/15/09
At 9:15 a.m. today, the sentence of Simba Q. Catt was officially commuted when a call went out from the Home Office to the site of the intended execution, notifying officials there that the sentence had been permanently injuncted. On condition of anonymity, sources close to the Home Office report that the decision was actually made yesterday afternoon, in a closed conference between the leading officers of the Right to Life Committee. Security surrounding the decision, we are told, was intentionally leaked in order to alleviate any further anxiety among the public.
Unnamed sources within the Home Office report that the reaction from Simba Q. was to demand that all future meals be "of the same high quality as that associated with the proverbial 'last meal' ", since his true last meal would now be indeterminable in any advance of the fact.
AP Wireless
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Post Script
Although Simba Q's sentence was commuted today, sources close to the case indicate that his health is in severe decline.
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